"Everyday Use" & "Marriage is a Private Affair" Story Connection

Everyone who is born in the world ideally will love their family as a vivid symbol of affection. In a family, the existence of multi-generation is very natural and can be considered as blessings. The older generation will guide the younger generations and will create a harmonious in the family. However, the existence of different generations sometimes may result in a different point of view which may lead to conflicts within the family. Those typical situations are perfectly told in the story plot of “Everyday Use” by Alice Walker and “Marriage is a Private Affair” by Chinua Achebe. Both of those short stories have a similar theme that described the conflict caused by different perspective between parents and children. Furthermore, this essay will compare three different aspects that can be analyzed through the two short stories, which are the different reasons of the conflict, the different family’s tradition, and the different environment surroundings that may influence the character’s way of thinking.

The first differences from both stories that will be elucidated are the reasons of the conflict where it describes of why the conflict was occurred. Both of “Everyday Use” and “Marriage is a Private Affair” has a different background of conflict but same of who that disagreed to each other, parents and children. In “Everyday Use”, the conflict happened between hard-working mother and her two daughters named as Dee and Maggie. Dee is the eldest daughters and very selfish while Maggie is Dee’s little sister who is quiet and withdrawn. The conflict was started when Maggie felt his life was much harder than Dee. The sentence “She thinks her sister has held life always in the palm of one hand, that “no” is a word the world never learned to say to her,” (Page 1) indicates that Dee was an adorable woman with all compiled desires while Maggie is a woman who cannot get what she wanted because of lack opportunity. Moreover, the conflict also occurred when Dee came back home for a while to see her mother. When she arrieved, she wanted to have her grandmother’s quilt to be displayed as an art but it was rejected by her mom because she will give it to Maggie. On the different story, “Marriage is a Private Affair” tells the reader about the conflict between father and son, Okeke and Nnaemeka. The conflict started when Nnaemeka wanted to marry the woman he loves but denied by Okeke who have determined the girl that suit to him “I have found a girl who will suit you admirably—Ugoye Nweke, the eldest daughter of our neighbor, Jacob Nweke.” (2). Nnaemeka tried to argue and asked his father’s approval but it was still rejected “I owe it to you, my son, as a duty to show you what is right and what is wrong. Whoever put this idea into your head might as well have cut your throat. It is Satan’s work.” (Page 3).

“Everyday Use” and “Marriage is a Private Affair” not only can be compared through the conflict’s background but also through the different family’s tradition. Basically, tradition can be in terms of heritage or culture that has been done for a long time where it should be preserved for next generations. In “Everyday Use”, the tradition was about passing the quilt to the daughters, either it was Dee or Maggie. The story shows the readers that both of Dee and Maggie wanted to own the quilt but they have a different purpose on it. Dee wanted the quilt since it can be considered as an art and should be displayed, however Maggie wanted it due to a respect for her grandmother and wanted to remember her forever. It is ever mentioned in Maggie’s statement  "She can have them, Mama,"(Page 5) and "I can remember Grandma Dee without the quilts." (Page 5). On the other hand, the tradition that exists in the “Marriage is a Private Affair” is about the marriage culture where it does not require love instead of a good character and being Christian. It can be seen in the story through Okeke’s statement, “What one looks for in a wife are a good character and a Christian background” (Page 3). That statement indicates if Okeke was able to determine who should his son marry with. However, Nnaemeka as Okeke’s son disagreed with his father and argued if he can marry the one he loves who is called as Nene Atang. It is once mentioned in Nnemeka’s statement, “Nene Atang from Calabar. She is the only girl I can marry.” (page 3).

It does not stop there, both of “Everyday Use” and “Marriage is a Private Affair” also can be compared to the character’s surrounding environment. Both of this short stories explicitly show the readers that environment really determines and influences how each character thinks and responds to their family traditions and cultures. In “Everyday Use”, it tells about Dee as the main character who moved to the city for study and once she came back, the way she thought was no more same. She argued that the quilt as an art and not as a tradition to remember her grandmother. Her way of thinking was very different compared to her mother and Maggie who lived in the urban area. On the other hand, “Marriage is a Private Affairs” tells about Nnemeka as the main character who lives in the modern city of Lagos and tried to determine his own life’s path by marrying the one she wants and loves. However, his father (Okeke) think differently and disagree with his decision. Okeke who lives in “remote parts of the country” argued that Nnemeka should follow their marriage culture where Okeke has determined already who Nnemeka should marry with.

“Everyday Use” and “Marriage is a Private Affair” have successfully drawn a very real situation on how conflict may occur between parents and children in terms of tradition and culture context. Both of these stories basically can be compared through three aspects, which are the different reasons for the conflict, the different family’s tradition, and the different environment surroundings of each main character. Alice Walker and Chinua Achebe through their story have shown the readers about how each generation might have a different perspective towards tradition and culture. That different persepctive or way of thinking might lead to a conflict between generation in a family in the future.